| Now then where do I re-begin? Ah yes, it was MOT time around October 
          (2002), a week to go. I wanted the car on road, even if it was winter. 
          So the car had nearly everything new, mechanically anyway, so what could 
          go wrong? I gave it another polish (An army saying - bulls**t baffles 
          brains) and checked the car over, such as lights, emissions, brakes 
          and a final check for any rust - no nothing. I was confident the car 
          would pass. I drove the car to Bath for it MOT. Ahhh! it failed on lights, 
          brakes and emissions. I drove off not in the best of moods. I didn't 
          even go back to work knowing that heartless jibes awaited me - they're 
          only jealous anyway! So it was rebooked for the following week and I 
          was determined to make it pass.
 I stripped the carburettors and re-set them and I even bought a Gas 
          Analyser to check the emission levels - one task out of the way. As 
          for the lights, yes you guessed it one of the light motors was a bit 
          sticky. Out it came for a dam good clean up. In it went and again and 
          again and again. Eventually, it went in to my satisfaction and now works, 
          a milli-second after the other light - but at least it works! As for 
          the back brakes, I put my hand up, it was my fault, after I put the 
          new brake shoes in I never connected them up properly - what a wally!
 
 So the car is now ready - MOT man do your worst! Anyway, I drove
  the 
          car to Bath for its re-check. As I pulled in the test centre the MoT 
          man just smirked. I in turn smirked back, he then sneared [I'm getting 
          images of "The Good, The Bad & The Ugly" - Ed]. Anyway the offending 
          failures were subsequently checked and …… Of course it passed! I was 
          now free to drive the UK's roads, top down - but it's winter I hear 
          you say - okay top down a bit then. 
 I was now the very proud owner of a gleaming bright red DHC TR7 with 
          a MOT and lots of new shiny bits. To celebrate, I drove the car to work 
          and much gasping took place from colleagues. "Yes" I said, "laugh on 
          now", it had become a much-admired car and a topic of conversation over 
          many a coffee.
 
 So that was October. Since that time, me being a man with a very low 
          boredom threshold, I decided to improve the car by giving the engine 
          a jolly good de-coking. I bought a new head and rocker gasket for the 
          occasion and subsequently removed the head - Ha! That's a tale in itself 
          - all I will say is bl***y head bolts - know what I mean?. To cut a 
          very long story short the head came off and was surprisingly in good 
          condition very little carbonisation. As the car only had, at the time, 
          98k on the clock, I thought perhaps this might have been its first de-coke 
          - maybe it was who knows, there's nothing in it service history to suggest 
          otherwise. After flicking through the pages of a well-known supplier 
          of parts, I decided that a new timing chain and tensioner was in order, 
          due to the low cost. It was time to put the engine back together, not 
          before however, I check the big ends. Off came the sump and well all 
          I can say was that I didn't need to spend any more money. Time to tackle 
          the head. On went the gasket, on went the head - anyone who has done 
          this job will know about and understand the annoying problem off lining 
          up the inlet manifold to block coolant union, and its small rubber sealant 
          ring - enough said! The head eventually went back on and the carburettors 
          back connected up. What a transformation, the car actually drove like 
          a sports car albeit a TR7.
 
 Since that time I've been happily driving the car to work daily and 
          since the summer has manifested itself I've had the hood down most days. 
          I still get the odd remark, like "I used to have one of those" and we 
          would give each other a knowing smile. Other remarks I still get is 
          "you don't see many of those now a days", to which I reply - "thank 
          god!"
 
 I'm coming to the end of my tale, "hooray", I hear you say. I'm about 
          to turn 40 in October and any reader who has reached that age will know 
          what this means. It means a new bright red sports car is needed to subdue 
          those impending feelings. A young minded man at 40 cannot be seen in 
          a classic car, as people will think he has a flat cap and smokes a pipe 
          - Um that comes later apparently. So to that end, I NEED a bright red 
          Porsche 944! [choke, chole, splutter, "heretic" - Ed] To make that happen 
          my wife tells me my TR7 has to go first, so to that end does anyone 
          want to continue the tale …?
 
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